Communication

Disagreements

Sharing

On Different Attitudes Regarding Punctuality

Personal Space

Chores

Home Improvement

Hobbies & Interests

On The Importance of Being Understood

Romance

Date Nights

Holidays & Special Occasions

Happily Ever After

1

5

21

23

3

9

15

19

11

13

Valentine's Day is a funny holiday...

...and it's lovely that we're both in on the joke.

Justin hasn’t spoken to Carrie in days.
He didn’t want to interrupt her.

1

10.

       Why don't
scientists trust
atoms anymore?
Because they make
up everything!

2.

3. Carrie and Justin have such a
wonderful relationship. He always knows what she’s
thinking because she always tells him. She always knows
what he’s thinking because she tells him that too.

           How do you
            know that
Google is male?
Because it thinks
it always knows
the answer.

5. Carrie wants to
talk to me about my childish
behavior. Well, she may want
that all she likes, but she’s not
getting inside my pillow castle
without a password!

6. If Justin speaks in the forest,
and Carrie isn’t there
to hear him... Is he still wrong?

4.

7. How do you know
that Google is female?
Because it never
lets you finish your
sentence before
making a suggestion.

8. Justin tried to have
a conversation with
Carrie while she was
putting on her mud mask.
You should’ve seen the dirty
look she gave him.

9. Why do women use twice as many
words as men? Because they
always have to repeat themselves.

When Justin first started dating Carrie,
she asked him what some of his dreams were.
He told her one was about a T. rex who didn't
get a job because he couldn't tie a tie. She meant goals.

11. Why does a rooster
crow so early in the
morning? He wants to
get a word in before
all the hens wake up.

12. Justin asked Carrie to rate his listening skills.
She said, “You’re an 8 on a scale of 10.” He still doesn’t know
why she wanted him to urinate on a skeleton.

13.

Carrie: Can you
please put ketchup
on your shopping list?
Justin: I’ve done it
but it makes it hard to read.

                   After 65 years of marriage, our
                   neighbor still calls his wife sweetheart.
So we asked him what the secret is. He said,
“I forgot her name and I'm afraid to ask.”

14.

15. If we're reading
their lips correctly...
Our neighbors are talking
about some creepy couple
next door.

16. Justin and Carrie
always fight over the right way
to hang a toilet paper roll.
So they agreed to try
each other’s way for a week.
You know... Roll reversal.

17. Interviewer: “Your résumé says you
take things too literally.” When the heck
did my resume learn to talk?!

18. Carrie asked Justin to go
get 6 cans of Sprite from the grocery store. When he
got home, he realized he had picked 7 up.

19. Carrie told Justin
to take out the spider instead of killing it.
So he did. They had a few drinks. He’s
a pretty cool guy, works in web design.

20.

Justin was outvoted 1-1
by Carrie again.

21. The police came to our
house and asked where
I was between 3 and 5.
I said preschool.

I told

YOU

so!

22

Sometimes Justin’s sense of direction isn’t great.
Luckily, he always proves he’s Carrie’s Mr. Left.

23. While we might
not always agree,
it’s nice that at this
moment, we’re on
the same page.

Justin accidentally deleted
Carrie’s audiobook. Now he’ll
never hear the end of it.

24.

25. Never laugh
at your partner’s
choices. You’re
one of them.

26. Justin and Carrie often laugh about how
competitive they are. But Justin laughs more.

27. Carrie thought Justin was
behaving immaturely. So he told her to get out of his fort.

28. Carrie was furious
with Justin today. He put a
stick in a non-stick pan.

29. Carrie yelled at Justin, “You haven’t heard
a single word I’ve said, have you?” He thought that was
a strange way to start a conversation.

             I always prefer
the stairs, whereas you
always like to take the
elevator. I guess we
were raised differently.

30.

31. Justin told
Carrie she should
embrace her mistakes.
She gave him a hug.

32. Arguing with
your partner is a lot
like trying to read the
Terms of Use on the
internet. In the end,
you just give up and
go "I agree."

33. Carrie told Justin
to stop acting like a flamingo,
so he had to put his foot down.

34. If at first
you don’t succeed,
try doing it the way
Carrie told you.

35.  Why didn't the
skeleton argue
with his girlfriend
on Valentine's
Day? He didn’t
have the heart.

36. Carrie put on a new dress
and asked Justin to zip it.
He’s not sure what he did
wrong – he hadn’t said a word.

37.

Justin: I feel like you always
disagree with me. Carrie:
I don't always disagree with you.

38.

                Two grains had
                a disagreement.
In the end, it was just
a corny argument.

39. Justin plays the world's most
dangerous sport. He disagrees
with Carrie.

40. I love you more today
than I did yesterday. But
that’s because yesterday
I was really mad at you.

41. Carrie and Justin have
agreed to never go to bed angry with each other.
So far, they’ve been up for three days.

                Carrie came home to find Justin
had been on eBay all day. If he’s still there tomorrow,
she’ll lower the price.

42.